05 Jun 2008

Expat Life - Culture Shock

The following is an extract from a well known article filed in the Weekly Telegraph. It was written by Canadian Robin Pascoe and we include it with thanks and recognition to Robin as the author of this work.

"I advise expats-to-be (certainly corporate families) that the situation will put them up automatically on the social ladder and they must be prepared," she says. "That's not just learning table etiquette but also relates to being a good guest in another country."

Identity is at the core of the culture shock of expat living and profoundly impacts on that 'expat class system' referred to by Nicole Rosenleaf Ritter. Where someone fits into expat social circles is very often based on where that person fits into the organization or company which employs him (or her) or sent him abroad. Or not fit, as the case may be.

Nationalities also play a social role. New expats often find themselves socializing with others from their own countries for no other reason than that they share a flag and find themselves reeling with shock from being with too many fellow countrymen.

Griping about local people and customs ironically brings some expats together. Everyone indulges in a few good whines from time to time, but when that's all the conversation is about, some new shocked expats want to ask: so why do you stay if you can't stand the country or its culture?

How do you combat 'expat life' culture shock whichever form it takes?
For starters, don't think that just because you carry the same passport as someone else you will automatically be friends or indeed have to be friends. Be your own person. It's nice to be around familiar people, but when they become overly familiar (as in every night or weekend), it's all right to bail out once in a while.

Like all forms of culture shock, you must strive for a period of adjustment which means acceptance. While you may not agree with social snobbery based on position, finance, or just how long one has been around, it comes with the territory. Remember that there are snobs 'at home' too. Likewise, there are unwritten class systems too.

Learn to rise above pettiness and gossip. This is a tall order because expat communities can be like small towns for petty grudges and wild rumours. But there is an advantage of living in a mobile community: sometimes the unhappy troublemaker making everyone else's life miserable moves on before you do.

Finally, just as you try to put your outrage on the back burner towards the local customs that make you crazy, it's best to do that with expat circles too. Remember that in all matters of culture, there is no right or wrong. Just different. And that applies to members of an international community who make different choices in the way they choose to live abroad.